Saturday, March 2, 2013

2 March :: things we learn from our partners

banana oat blender pancakes. flour free.
He's been my model for really, truly relaxing at home. Something I realize I've never been good at, sitting down. He thinks it's my backhanded compliment, a "nice" way to call him lazy. But I truly don't mean that. He really truly knows how to just sit and do the things he enjoys. Granted, that's usually reading history books, doing crosswords or playing some shooting fruit game on his Ipod, watching movies on the Kindle or TV, or playing video games. While I'm usually biddying about the house. Washing dishes, folding laundry, cooking or baking, sweeping, fluffing the nest so we say. And don't get me wrong, i LOVE doing those things. But you know? There's something to be said for letting it all go sometimes and taking a stretch of hours just to knit (did that for two last weekend). Or really get into a novel, not just the paragraph you try to get through just before dropping off to sleep at night. I get into that mode of "how much can i fit into this day off?" Um, isn't that what we dreamy "homemakers" who actually work full-time outside the home do in our weekday planners ALL the time? So I'll make to-do lists that seemingly stretch on forever, and I'm so excited when I've woken up early and can try to make it through the list. But often, it's the leisure time that feels crammed in or just not gotten to at all. Meanwhile, I'm flurrying about, and he's just been in one place. I don't think I could do it like him. I'm a doer by nature. It's part of what makes me happy. But less planning on the weekends has actually made them feel longer. I'm figuring out time in the week to "sneak in" things I'd rather not be doing on a Saturday. So I go across the bay for groceries on a Friday night. I've definitely felt like we've had more just snuggle on the couch time lately. Without my mind racing. We have a new Friday night tradition of ordering pizza and watching TV. We love it. I realize that things don't have to be super-planned, all the time. I just like setting and then acting on the intention to not only nurture myself, but in the process, to nurture our relationship, as well.

Anyway, what do you learn from your partner that you are grateful for?


  1. It's easy for one person to relax if the other is constantly keeping things up.. so I'd say that you have nurtured the relaxation in him that you see. :)

  2. I'm happy that your intentional planning and intentional un-doing has allowed you to have longer weekends and more relaxing time with your hunny!

  3. I find I love the same thing in Troy...he helps me recognize that sometimes I need to just freaking sit down and relax. Like John, he does his share of helping, but he also can just sit in one place reading for HOURS. Meanwhile, while I'm reading I'm making lists in my head & planning my next move! Can't sit still. Troy reminds me to do that intentionally. I think it's part of our multi-tasking nature as ladies, but I still like just taking a moment to breathe now & then....

  4. that's so wonderful to hear that about both John & Troy. Oscar talks me through my anxious thoughts.. haha.. and sometimes he makes fun of it, playfully. his energy is much more outward and has a sound mind for dealing with things. nothing scares him. he's just like "ok.. that doesn't sound so bad. why is that a big deal hun? do you need snuggles?"

    i think the three of us are just busy ladies with lots of things we like to do and that we care about. :)